A man was arrested in Atlanta for allegedly stealing hard drives containing Beyoncé’s unreleased music and other tour-materials, which were taken from a vehicle used by her crew. What do you think?
“Jay-Z knows he can just ask, right?”
Leo Bandholz, Systems Analyst

“God forbid a fan want to get a jump on learning the choreography.”
Katherine Periat, Report Generator

“He’s just lucky the police got to him before her fanbase did.”
Pete Schrauth, Morale Consultant