EAST RUTHERFORD, NJ—In an effort to console the team’s star running back as he recuperated from a season-ending lower-leg injury, the New York Giants medical staff reportedly assured Cam Skattebo on Friday that he would only be missing Giants games. “Hey, you got lucky—just imagine if you were missing something more important than a bunch of pointless Giants games,” said team head trainer Ronnie Barnes, adding that it was not as though Skattebo played for the Buffalo Bills, Philadelphia Eagles, Indianapolis Colts, Green Bay Packers, or any another legitimate NFL contender that had a record better than 2-6 and was in a position in which a top player’s absence would actually make a difference. “The important thing is it’s nothing serious, just a few meaningless matchups in an already-lost season. Your injury will in no way prevent you from competing in games with real stakes.” At press time, sources confirmed Skattebo was feeling much better after being reminded that even when he did play again, it would still only be with the Giants.
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