We’re aware that it’s a bold claim, but the following tweet from an account called Cœur de Léon may well be the most pretentious tweet of all time.
It’s a suggestion that to hold a conversation with someone you should be familiar with the works of the following 24 writers and philosophers at the very least.
Here’s the tweet.
We’ll be honest, there’s a fair few on that list whose names we’d struggle to even spell. Perhaps the replies weren’t quite as profound as the collected works of Schopenhauer, but there’s no doubt that they were more entertaining…
1.
People must groan when you enter a room
— Chris Nodimas (@CholeraFan) August 14, 2025
2.
Hate to say it, but that’s not a conversation. It’s ego masturbation for faux intellectuals.
— Thag (@Thag34628730) August 15, 2025
3.
is there something i should read that will prevent me making posts like this
— christina 死神 (@chhopsky) August 14, 2025
4.
Have you read Thucydides, Homer and Aristotle in the original Greek? If you haven’t then no conversation
— Frances Forbes-Carbines (@Francesforbesca) August 14, 2025
5.
Cellini’s so nice, you had to put him twice.
— patrick (@greeknoon) August 12, 2025
6.
And not one single nasty female thought or word to contaminate your fusty, achingly pretentious little mental bubble. What a testostimony.
— Julie Hull (@rivier) August 15, 2025
7.
Bare minimum for holding a conversation: London, New York, Paris, Munich, everybody talk about pop muzik. Talk about. Pop muzik. https://t.co/X6oMfZZTyv
— Count Mysterioso️ (@MysteriosoX) August 15, 2025
8.
sounds like you suck at holding conversations https://t.co/7v72FHWhDi
— mnogomili4kata-sf (@vlaamsebulgarka) August 16, 2025
9.
I would gladly not have a conversation with you https://t.co/qOSdsiHSXA
— keewa (@keewa) August 16, 2025
10.
What is this guy talking about? I haven’t heard of a single one of these bands https://t.co/GWZpu2mBTA
— jake (just a normal single guy) (@wormpuller) August 18, 2025
11.
bare minimum for not letting the other person talk at all https://t.co/GtZyXCLcGf
— anj (@anjalievable) August 16, 2025
12.
I ain’t reading all that https://t.co/1KcfctiuAe
— camilo (@AscendedYield) August 16, 2025
13.
Bare minimum for holding a conversation: Dr Who, 2000AD, Grange Hill, the weird shit they put on ITV Night Time in the 80s & 90s, Star Trek, Clive Barker, board games and rpgs, early Channel 4, Battle of the Planets, Space: 1999, UFOs & ghosts, local video shops, Alan Moore https://t.co/hMnZxmqwsQ
— Scarred for Life (@ScarredForLife2) August 15, 2025
14.
Bare minimum for holding a conversation: weather, how was your day, what did you get up to, here’s a funny story that happened to me https://t.co/vXtWG2yDhZ
— sean (@DilettanteryPod) August 16, 2025
15.
Bare minimum for holding a conversation: the social skills and self awareness to not make posts like this https://t.co/Z39JDo1W95
— Al (@SweatieAngle) August 14, 2025
16.
Bare minimum for holding a conversation: eyes, ears, lungs, vocal cords. https://t.co/RCSB7LUTJs
— Julien (planting trees) (@cubstaged) August 14, 2025
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This ‘ultimate vox pop’ about what it means to be British is sure to upset all the right people and it just makes it even better
