Alien: Earth, the latest entry in the Alien franchise, is now streaming. The Onion shares everything you need to know about the sci-fi series.
Q: Where is it streaming?
A: Looks like the guy sitting next to you on the bus has it playing pretty loudly.
Q: Is it appropriate for children?
A: No, but neither is Euphoria and you let them watch that.
Q: Who is the protagonist?
A: Probably not the guy who just got torn in half.
Q: How much goo is there?
A: The show was rated a 7.6 on the Holtz Goo Scale.
Q: What did the show’s $250 million budget go towards?
A: Trimming Sydney Chandler’s micro bob every 20 minutes.
Q: How much mouth impregnation we talking here?
A: Regular amount.
Q: When does Season 2 come out?
A: They released Alien in 1979.
