Get ready to cry until your body runs out of tears, because this is about as heartwarming as it gets: When this middle school music class learned that Tré Cool from Green Day only has one testicle, they rounded up an entire bucket of human testicles and left it on his porch.
Awwwww! Looks like the kids are alright after all!
When kids in Mr. Lawrence’s sixth-grade music class in suburban Boulder, Colorado started their unit on the history of punk rock, they discovered a detail about Green Day drummer Tré Cool that had them incredibly concerned: that he’d lost one of his testicles in a tragic unicycle accident as a kid. While a lot of kids would have laughed about Tré’s misfortune, the good-hearted students in Mr. Lawrence’s class felt so bad that Tré was running around with one ball that they immediately got to work trying to get him some new ones.
For weeks on end, the band students did their best to scrounge up every last human testicle they could get their hands on, bringing them to school in their Stanley cups and lunch pails and dumping them into a bucket in the teachers’ lounge fridge. After the bucket was filled to the brim with testicles of all shapes and sizes (and even a few scrotums for good measure), the entire class hopped into a school bus and make the two-day journey to Oakland, California, where they dragged the overflowing bucket of human testicles onto Tré’s front porch, rang his doorbell, and skittered away.
Damn. It’s a good thing iPhones are waterproof now, because there’s no doubt your phone is soaked in tears after reading this.
If you need proof that the next generation is going to be okay, look no further than Mr. Lawrence’s class. Everyone should follow the example of the exemplary act of kindness they performed for Mr. Cool and his half-empty scrotum.
